Oh God Oh God! i know i've been thinking stupid thoughts, stupid feeling. and i believe all this are gonna GO AWAY soon. now i just need to find back myself. e real ME! Please get back soon!all e thoughts of stepping down as CGC and feeling that i cant even imaging and worst still, im thinking back of e old decision i use to have. wanting to go Heaven now! came to a point where i doesnt know where to go but Heaven. but another side was thinking, when i go Heaven now, what will God say to me?

there're still things which are unsaid. but e heavy heart that i have no one will ever understand. and i just wish to hide in one side and double think of it. i just feel like hiding myself from God, from ppl who love me, ppl in e cg. one word, i just feel useless, stupid and so on and so forth. i doesnt know what will happen next but all this are God's Planning. i know i let alot ppl down by saying all this. But where's e Kim that everyone see in e past? i really dono. but please. give me some time still.

*it is said to have a Smile but inside it doesnt.