Hmms. Its really hard to keep everything in myself. its really really really hard. in e end, i'll die in e inside. or rather die in e outward. and its really hard to find someone who u can talk to. i cant find anyone to talk to expect my Hellokitty seriously. everyone has it own prob. and i couldnt wan to add it their burdens or trouble. but i really really really. i feel that my life has really come to e end le where i doesnt know where im gg. its really come to e end that even my ownself doesnt find any purpose and doesnt really know who i am. I've lost everything. I've e "Joy, Happiness, purpose and everything everything". HEY! im tired. super tired. tired until come to a point where i really wanna to give up in everything le. "IF ONLY" i could find back my Everything.

Hmms. "IF ONLY", one day just one day will do that my Family gather tgt just to have dinner or Lunch or Breakfast tgt. Just one day. Yes. just one day will do. and im really satisfy le. seriously. Yes, im sad when i see everyone of e Family gather tgt. Every Sunday, Everyone could just go back home and eat Dinner with Family. and i could just slack at home. and im always don feel like gg back so early on sunday de. so u wont be surprise everytime when u see me in e Fellowship aft svc, for sure i'll stay de. But everyone gonna go back to have dinner with Family. But its alright. *si guan jiu hao.*

Hmms. and until now, there's no news of him. issit good or bad news? what news i wan? Good or bad? i really dono. im also very trouble by this thing and i have nothing to say of him le. Yes, of cos im SAD of this thing. and im really tired le. Seriously. it happen and happen again. when does it gg to stop? until he die or until i die? if there's a choice. i could choose that i'll die 1st. u wont know what will happen in e end. *Hopeless!*.

Hmms. and i wont blogging cos hols is next week and my house cant log in asin my blogger couldnt sign in so ya. and here im goona end.

`strong in e outside but weak in e inside.